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celestie0 · 1 month ago

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hi friends, i won’t be posting or updating any of my works for an indefinite period n will be on hiatus from this blog as well.

i’ve unlisted kickoff & ihm on ao3 (haven’t deleted, they’ve just been made private) and i’ve unpinned my masterlist here on tumblr (again nothing’s been deleted so you could probably find the chapters if you searched my tags)

but the reason i did that is because i don’t want any new readers finding my works during my hiatus because i don’t want to potentially upset more people in the event that, during this hiatus, i decide that i would no longer like to write my fics

that would be an insanely sad decision to make. i put so much thought into my stories not because i am trying to make them entertaining, but it’s because they genuinely mean so much to me and are cathartic in ways i can’t describe. i have spent a great majority of my life self negating for the sake of others, and so writing was just a form of expression where i could talk about all the things i’ve suppressed over the years - anxiety, career stress, financial stress, avoidance, depression, loss, coming of age, navigating love, etc

but lately, and i do think it’s been a build up of just some careless words from a handful of people over the months, i find myself steering towards a practice of writing that is no longer asking the question “how can i put as much of myself in this piece as possible?” but rather “how can i make sure people won’t criticize this…i feel awful that it doesn’t have what they want it to have…other creators are doing xyz, should i be doing that too?…i’m just scared to share this”

not exactly sure when that shift in headspace began, but as of right now, it’s as strong as ever. and i understand that those questions may seem irrational, and i just have to try to not focus on the feeling, n i wish i was someone that could compartmentalize those thoughts better, but here’s the thing — the whole reason i started expressing myself through writing in the first place was because i’ve spent my whole life compartmentalizing. it would feel so ironic & untrue to the lessons i’ve learned in this journey if i just chose to “suck this up” and continue pushing forward until i reach a point of burnout simply because i don’t want to upset anyone

i’m really sorry i couldn’t focus on the positive. especially with all the insane n incredible amount of love n support i’ve received for my works. i’ve said this time n time again but when i started posting kickoff to ao3 back in january of this year, i had NO idea it would be this loved by so many people…i was like ok can’t wait to interact w these four readers for the rest of the year…and then BAM, i find myself fully sobbing after each chapter update because i was so touched by all the sweet n kind words. i don’t want this decision to come off in a way that makes it seems like i don’t love u guys sm or that i’m ungrateful — i’ve always taken pride in respecting my audience. even for a simple hobby, i try to put effort into my works. i proofread, i plan out, i edit in length, all because i am, well, for one, i’m a bit of a perfectionist LOL but also i think there’s a great deal of honor in respecting an audience that gives you their time n attention

but i already am struggling in my life to focus on the positive. medicine has been such an incredibly daunting career to pursue, i’m honestly only doing slightly better now because i’m just filled with relief that i got into med school to begin with lol it’s still surreal to me, so the stress has been kinda manageable so far on that sense of optimism, but dear god the shit i went through to get here…and the shit i know i still face ahead of me. i spend all of my serotonin on trying to stay positive in the face of my responsibilities. so all of this time i’ve spent trying to stay positive for the sake of my stories too has just left me with so much exhaustion — i just don’t see why posting my works should be anything less than fun and endlessly exciting when it’s a hobby that’s supposed to help me thru the actual brunt of life.

anyways, i’m getting a little carried away here. all this to say, i just need to take time away from posting my works so i can see writing as something for myself n not for others again. i don’t want the thoughts swimming in my head to be thoughts of anxiety over people potentially criticizing me n my creative decisions. i want the thoughts in my head to once again be positive, excited, and nurturing towards my stories. i don’t see how i can accomplish that at this point unless i start writing for myself once more, and not for others

i still have a great deal of passion to write, which is why i haven’t formally taken down my works. i anticipate that i may be able to come back in the future to share my writing again. but as of right now, i just want to heal the relationship that i have with this hobby, and i feel like that’s gotta happen in private (lmfao it sounds like im tryna freak my writing)

i’m sorry that i turned off my asks n my replies, i know so many of u care about me n want to support me n i just am beyond thankful. i don’t anticipate this is a forever goodbye, but i do just need some time rn away from all of this.

hope u all have a happy time!! and take care of yourselves :) much love

- ellie

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star-girl69 · 10 months ago

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something something about clarisse in the childhood best friend trope does things to me, especially when her and the reader already had like dozens of sleepovers, know practically everything about each other (other than that they like like each other) and then one of them gets a bit distant bc the feelings too much (me too, I would also go crazy being in love with clarisse LIKE HELLO)

just throwing my favourite trope/dynamic out there because I love lots of pining (not a request)

have a lovely day and make sure to stay hydrated!! <33 (I always lurk around tumblr in the evening and read your works because it's just so good and then I sleep well)

clarisse w friends to lovers is so dear to me bc it would happen like so ridiculously fast

you’re like the best friends in the world, always together, everyone thinks you’re dating already but clar would be 5x worse if you actually were

if you started pulling away clarisse would try and tell herself it’s ok and you must just need some space

that would last like a day before she’s confronting you bc she’s codependent

then obviously YOU’RE not saying anything and trying to dance around it, you look rly pretty rn and clarisse just wants you to shut up and kiss her so she does it for you

the kiss is immediately just like the best thing ever

like no taking it slow you both have wanted this too much for too long

if clarisse started to pull away it would be wildly different

you would give her a day or two then try and talk to her about it but she’s feeling all weak?? YOU have to come to HER and she just gets all defensive and you have a fight and then it’s like super dramatic friendship OVER

you’re both miserable without each other and on the third night you both sneak out to go to each others cabins, meet in the middle, look at each other, and then just start making out

im a big believer in clarisse x spontaneous make out sessions if you couldn’t tell

—-

tysmmm anon and you’re so real for that fanfiction before bed is the besstttttt

#clarisse la rue #clarisse la rue x reader #clarisse thoughts #pjo x reader #addie says stuff!!!

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mcbeetlebeeb · 1 month ago

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Perchance if your requests are open then I would like a modern reader with homestuck characters of your choosing?? If not that's ok you don't gotta if you don't wanna. Have good day

Hii, sorry for the INCREDIBLY late response, trying to remember how to use tumblr BUT YES I shall deliver 👍 thanks for asking question, I'll be doing the main four (ФωФ)

(and- hopefully I understand your question cause I'm ready to do this in head cannon platform- so??‐ 🫂 take it my friend)

⛅️John Egbert🎭

*deep inhale* NERRD

sorry, moving on

seems like the sorta guy to know fnaf lore, like all of it, I can't elaborate further

also he wears totally normal outfits with stupid stupid socks,,

silly socks, the dumbest you could imagine

I think at some point he'd be the mfker with some tape or a bandaid around the middle of his glasses to keep it together

hes a one pillow sleeper 😔

and by that I mean he has one singular pillow on his bed smh

he atones by sleeping with stuffed animals though

mfkin creepy ass light sleeper

and I say that cause I can fully imagine someone trying to get something while he's sleeping or even trying to wake him up

and he just sits up, all the way, no glasses john, eyes open all the way not groggy or confused

get this MAN SOME BROWN EYE CONTACTS!!

FUCK I THOUGHT THATD MAKE IT SMALLER HER FACE IS HUGE

no going back tumblr is already so confusing, sorry anon I tried to be funny now she's here

anyway..lord..

I think he'd forever go to bed at like a super specific time, and if he messes that up he feels wrong the next day

and that's all he'll tell you, "I feel wrong"

touch of the tisim probably perhaps maybe

listen his dad collected shaving cream and harlequins and clowns and stuff-..

I don't think he has freckles but more so little body moles speckled around his body

goofy smile, silly laugh, catch him snorting and slapping his knee n shit

tries to push up glasses with the nose scrunch thing, makes him show of his messes up teeth

an endearing young punster.

I definitely think if you'd be down, he's 100% the person too have nerf gun wars

something and John Egbert and a foam dart makes sense

and for some reason i connect that with bubbles

rip John you would've loved fruiter aergo

maybe, maybe more low quality photos of it though because idk

he has a strange love for...what's the word...

hmm.. eccentric things

he just holds them dear, think it's in his blood

who knows if that's a good or bad thing

expressive

I think you'd have to be, blind, deaf, mute and impossibly stupid to miss his body language

or just a meanie(?)

regardless not emotionally verbal, or at least not often, or- as much as he should

but physically shows it

like..for example if he was in a crappy mood, you'd be able to tell, and he'd confirm if you asked

and with him being expressive i would think comes with..what's the word again..uh..

responsive?

reactive?

especially to words, or touch

when he gets red, he one of them people to get red EVERywhere.

ears, down to the neck, shoulders, forhead.

dude looks like he's gonna pop a blood vessel any moment lmao

he'd be the person too have like reddened knuckles and stuff, cold hands, will press the cold hands into you for warmth

if he were to smell like anything, vanilla, faintly, all smells on him would be faint I'd like to think

☀️Rose Lalonde🔮

honestly my favorite to draw-

she is wrighting so many silly things for and too you

poems?

happening.

long strangely war letter back home love letters too you

they probably are never shown-

maybe unless you look or perhaps ask

she'd be...the best person to gossip over a drink with

tea, coffee, alcohol, water, soda

I think she'd be a mfker to sleep with socks

it's okay on some level cause they're socks she made herself

I also think not just gossip but she's like- she's a seer of light cmon-

she knows stuff

I think she may not look like it but she, is the ultimate yapper

and silly

silly Rose justice

shes a goofy goober too guys

there would be no way she's not

look at her friends

I think she'd like her hair to be pet sometimes

play with it gently, braid it for no reason

type of person I can see too sit with you on the porch as it rains

reminds me of mist and.. morning dew

chilly autumn mornings

where you can see your breath

shes one of them Halloween people

i just know she appreciates a crunchy leaf

*knits you this*

YOU SIZED OBVIOUSLY

also gloves

why not

stay warm

she'd want you too

she has dimples

both lil cheek dimples

I think she'd be someone to ponder her partner often

like, seeing a candle and going "oh perfect, you've found me here as well!" but she's in the middle of some store lol

or reading something, thinking about that phrase and linking it too you or something like that

something strangely meticulous

carefully, honestly, thought out.

shes the person too either meticulous take the time to paint her nails right

or paint them all fucked up, and then clean them up

leaning more towards the latter

am I saying that right?

she would smell like

mm, cold linen, and books, book smell

🌠Jade Harely🐾

ah yes

doggie

shes a sweetheart though

albeit a clumsy- narcoleptic one

she means well

most times

she has all the hair

everywhere!!

find her brushing herself

maybe???

maybe space powers debunk hair needs

I dunno probably pffhfhh

toothy smile

big toothy grin

I like to think she has braces

convincingly can bark and growl (before and after bec merge thingy)

probably got even more convincing dog bark talents

sit down with her and a good coloring book

entertainment for hours

she'd be up for most anything I bet

would possibly be bored laying around lounging

something tells me she'd have a thing with buttons

all shapes and sizes and materials

just- checks out as a Jade thing yknow

same with silly bands

somewhere there is glitter on this girl I'm convinced

maybe more earth glitter (dirt) than any other

but like, 🤷 I dunno man

can I pet dat dawg?

yes, pet the dog, dog longs for human contact

scratch that

contact

overall

shes just lonely, forgive her lack of "norm" social skills

brotha grew up on a damn island, with her dog, and stuffed grandpa

stuffed grandpa

I'd be a lil weirdo too

anon, I'm gonna tell you this now..

I've never read the books all the way threw, and I own 3 out of idk how many

so forgive me if this...- out of character

dirty nailz..

yknow how some big dogs have that mindset that they are little lap dog puppies?

her

oh you thought it was gonna be a lil head rest?

a lil lean?

blanket mode.

snuggle time.

accept it, at least for a minute.

I cannot explain why and I won't but, she gives me road runner vibes

just..yep, that's jade..harely..

what am I doing dude tf

also..don't ask me why, she would smell like pine, dirt, soil if you will, maybe lavender too, or more something..sugary? cinnamon?

am I making sense

⚔️Dave Strider📀

uughhh what haven't I said about this dude

hmm

I'm trying to remember what I wrote before tumblr rudely disrupted my wrighting and made me go back to the beginning

well let's see

eotushuf

here me out

this but on him

and it's soft blonde and and

there's spots that are missing from scars

and they go down to his hand,, and fingers

the hair on the side of the hand, you know what I mean

also has missing little patches

broad..finge nail

chews his nails

hhe.. uu h out of all of the four, probably the best to lounge around with

laying around

what's the word

parallel play?

being able to comfortably do yalls own thing in the same place

without a lot of talking

rhhrrgg

hes the type of person to 100% do the three hand squeeze thing

iykyk... (squeezing someone's hand to wordlessly say, "I love you")

and if you respond verbally, or even just squeezing back

he'll face away and do it back again

epitome of "putting on sunglasses so no one knows what I'm looking at"

you at you

he has..like stupid peripheral vision and uses it to advantage

I cannot say why but, he definitely has funky cool ties

just does i feel it

also, crackley

cracking his knuckles, his neck, back

when he stands it's like fine machinery sounding

clicking and popping in knees and hips

blonde

...eyelashes..

rough palms and scar knuckles

he smells like- a well slept on pillow ina good way- and also maybe

faintly of apple juice, carton apple juice..

guys this is buns, I'm so sorry truly, I'm also..so sleepy..😔

anon i hope this was right, and..to your request, I hope u have a good day (*^▽^)/★*☆♪

#gay people #very fruity #homestuck #dave strider #rose lalonde #john egbert #jade harley #dave strider x reader #rose lalonde x reader #jade harely x reader #john egbert x reader #x reader #this is buns #i sorry #buns #haha #okay

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bluehwale · 2 years ago

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Ok sooo, you said that I could send my request and I couldn't wait any longer. The first fic is when they confessed for reader, but I'll love to know how they met reader and how they became that tight friend, a prequel if you will. That was it, thanks dear!

"the rainbow thief": the beginning | demigods! poly ateez au

01 / ‘the rainbow thief’ masterpost / next

summary. you never expected to be in a camp meant for demigods but, here you are. you also didn't expect on becoming friends with a brooding emo boy who introduces you to five of his friends, nor do you expect to meet two bickering best friends but, here you are. or alternatively, you meet eight boys that makes your life much more bearable.

pairing(s). ot8 demigods! ateez x daughter of iris! reader (son of hades! hongjoong, son of athena! hwa, son of apollo! yunho, son of poseidon! yeosang, son of zeus! san, son of aphrodite! mingi, son of dionysus! wooyoung & son of ares! jongho)

word count. 2.7k

genre. crack, flustered joong, fluff!, san being clumsy (again)

warnings. cursing, mentions of anxiety, alcohol intake (wooyoung and his wine), impulsive writing so it's not the best, camp half blood universe inaccuracies help

note. thankyou for the req and im so sorry i posted it so late!! i totally forgot abt tumblr bc i was having too much fun on my spring break im sorry T_T but it's here now!!! i also won't be accepting any more requests for demigods! atz </3

Hongjoong feels sick.

“I think you’re fine.” Yunho frowns, pressing his palm against Hongjooong’s forehead one last time just to make sure. The healer did everything he could, even resorting to human hospital’s protocol check-ups when his hyung refused the usual nectar and ambrosia because he insists that, “something’s really wrong with me, Yunho, and I don’t think those can fix it.”

The healer can only groan inwardly at his friend’s stubbornness because there’s nothing a little nectar, ambrosia, and his glowing fingertips can’t fix. But of course, he continues to entertain him as he’s not in the mood to test the patience of a son of Hades today.

“What are your symptoms again?” Yunho asks flatly, inflating the cuff wrapped around Hongjoong’s upper arm to gauge his blood pressure again (in truth, he doesn’t know how to read a blood pressure monitor but does it anyway for Hongjoong’s sake) to appease his “patient” who is currently sitting on a cot because he feels “sick.”

“I had this really weird feeling in my stomach, like, it feels like my organs are squashed around and everything inside me turned upside down,” Yunho frowns. Okay, that sounds pretty serious. “And my face got all hot, my feet couldn’t stop twitching, and I stuttered too!” Hongjoong continues, bringing a hand to his head in worry. “This doesn’t feel like me at all.”

“Hyung, was there anything that made you feel anxious?” eyebrows furrowed in concern, Yunho regards Hongjoong carefully. “If there’s anything troubling your mind lately, I’m here to listen.”

“No, I don’t think it’s anything like that—”

An unfamiliar figure suddenly pops inside the curtain circling the cot, momentarily surprising Yunho and leaving Hongjoong stunned once he recognizes the person in front of him.

“Sorry, hi,” you grimace, feeling apologetic towards the tall boy you scared with your uninvited presence. You just got here, alone and wary, with a few scratches here and there from being chased by monsters, so you hope the cute boy with soft looking hair in front of you is the person you’re looking for and that your day won’t be even more ruined by an embarrassing moment of you mistaking him for another person. “I was told to find a Yunho here? They said he could give me something to help with my injuries.”

Forgetting entirely about his hyung’s complaints, Yunho rapidly deflates the cuff still circling Hongjoong’s arm and rips it off in a rushed manner, earning a loud yelp from the poor raven haired boy still sitting on the cot (he did not end up checking the numbers on the monitor).

Hongjoong feels his heartbeat quicken when your gaze lands on him once you stand on your tippy toes to look over Yunho’s shoulder in curiosity. A smile threatens to creep up on his own face when he notices your eyes brighten and a sweet smile curling up your lips. “Oh, Hongjoong! Hi!”

“_____. Good to see you again.”

Yunho flicks his eyes back and forth between you and Hongjoong, mischievously grinning at the interaction you’re both having because it takes awhile for Hongjoong to warm up to people and it seems like you’re new, so to think that Hongjoong has warmed up to you that quick, you must be quite the character. Or maybe, the emotionally stunted son of Hades has finally taken an interest in someone.

Yunho leans towards the latter. And he can’t wait to tell the others about this so they can all tease him about it.

“Oh,” you take note of him sitting on a cot and remind yourself that you’re in the infirmary, causing your eyes to rake over Hongjoong in worry. “Are you okay? You’re hurt?”

“No! I’m perfectly fine!” The raven haired boy who was previously complaining about his “weakened knees” suddenly sprang up from the bed, seemingly energized, and pushes a gawking Yunho over your direction with a tight grip on the back of his shoulders. “You should let Yunho check up on you then get some rest. Hope you feel better soon.”

You smile in thanks at the boy you met a few hours prior, the first person who greeted you when you stepped foot on camp, and bid him a goodbye as he turns to leave the infirmary to let Yunho tend to you alone.

Before he could, however, you nonchalantly tell him, “I like those glasses on you. Looks cute.”

A pause, and then, there it is.

Hongjoong’s cheeks slowly flame a bright pink, the soles of his sneakers nervously squeaking against the hardwood floors as he turns his head to face you with his eyes flicking to every corner of the room and anywhere that does not land on your figure. An intangible noise escapes his throat. “T-thanks.”

Oh. Yunho slaps a hand over his mouth as he tries his damn best to stifle in the laughter to save face of Hongjoong’s dignity.

Hongjoong’s not sick.

For the first time ever, Hongjoong is flustered.

‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ✺◟( • ω • )◞✺

“That’s _____? Hongjoong’s _____?”

Hongjoong smacks the back of the two-tone haired boy’s head as he hisses, “If you don’t lower your fucking voice.”

Wooyoung’s yowl of pain is followed with a death glare shot at his hyung, the slightly tipsy boy hugging his ‘I LOVE DIONYSUS’ mug close to his chest to avoid any unnecessary spillage of perfectly good wine. “What was that for?” he cries. “They won’t even be able to hear me,” he grumbles, pointing to the group of Iris kids noisily huddled together in celebration of winning a game of Capture the Flag against the Athena kids. An impressive rarity. Athena kids are known to be very strategic with their battle plans, even in mere simulations like the game they play every Friday, which is why the Iris kids are especially happy.

Yunho tsks at the slurring of his friend’s speech, forcefully wrangling the mug of wine away from the alcohol fiend. Or at least, he attempts to, for the son of Dionysus quickly snatches the mug to avoid his prying fingers, an expression of mocking retaliation sent his way.

“She’s so cool,” Mingi dreamily sighs, having hearts as eyes as he continues to look at you in awe. You’re in the center of the Iris kids circle, a wide smile plastered on your lips as everyone else rejoices on your team’s victory. You meet eyes with both Hongjoong and Yunho (who is still busy trying to keep his feral friend at bay), sending an excited wave their way in greeting which earns back a proud thumbs up from Yunho and a genuinely heartwarming smile from Hongjoong.

“You have to introduce me to her!” Mingi gasps eagerly, hopping around Hongjoong while flailing his arms in glee, unknowingly landing hits on the silently seething raven haired boy who pointedly glares at him in return.

“You can do it yourself.”

“Someone’s doing it right now,” Jongho points out, the rest of the boys turning their heads to see their own Seonghwa hyung, the head counselor of the Athena cabin, make his way towards you and shake your hand with a gentle smile. It seems that he’s congratulating you for your win and Jongho chortles at the obvious twinkle in the eldest’ eyes. He’s trying to make a move on you.

And he can see why Seonghwa, alongside Hongjoong and Yunho, has taken an interest in you.

Because although your fellow siblings are urgently trying to sweep you into the dining pavilion for a celebratory dinner, you still take the time to meet the three new faces that are close friends with Hongjoong. Amidst the conversation between the rest of the boys and you, Jongho gets why it’s so easy for Hongjoong and Yunho to be close to you in the span of a week. Your contradictingly soft but bubbly personality seems to shine out of you, easily melting the coldest hearts (cough, Hongjoong hyung, cough), and the way you always seem to have an easy smile on your face softens just about anyone.

It’s easy to like you.

“Who are they?” you question your siblings once you’ve sat in the Iris table in the dining pavilion, distractedly biting onto your chopsticks as you try to be discreet in sneaking a look at the two lone boys sitting separately in the Zeus table and the Poseidon table. Both tables that, apparently, have been unoccupied for years.

A new kid of the big three; Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades, always garner attention because they’re so rare in quantity. Especially now that there’s two of them, one of your siblings, Yuna, excitedly jumps to inform you. “We don’t know their names yet but I heard they came in while we were just starting the game. Probably why we didn’t hear anything about them until now,” she shrugs, shoving another piece of gimbap into her mouth. “But the other campers said they got claimed immediately after coming here! That’s usually unheard of from the big three.”

Your brother, Keeho, who took the displeasing choice of sitting beside Yuna grimaces in disgust as he force shut her open chewing mouth. “Don’t talk while you’re chewing.”

You take another look at the two boys sitting silently with their heads slightly lowered, taking note of the unhealed scratches and bruises blooming all over their skin. You gasp, turning back to Keeho to ask, “What happened to them?”

“Heard they were hunted by a minotaur which is why they’re both forced to come here. All of the Apollo kids were stationed at our game earlier in case anything happens, probably why they haven’t had the chance to be healed.”

You shovel the rest of your food down your throat, almost choking in the process which earned a few panicked concerns from your siblings, but you ignore them and quickly move to the closest table, the Zeus table, after chugging down water from your goblet.

“Hi! I’m ______. It’s nice to meet you.”

The blonde looks up in surprise to see you and you use the short pause to take a good look at his face. Soft slanted eyes that oddly remind you of a cat’s greet you alongside a shy smile that spreads across his face and pops out both of his dimples.

Oh, you think. You didn’t expect him to be so handsome. You’re screwed.

“_____,” he repeats your name, pleasantly basking in the friendly smile you give him. You slightly waver at the way he says your name so sweetly. “I’m San. It’s nice to meet you too.”

“How are you liking it here?” you ask, trying to start a conversation in hopes of easing his first-day jitters. “I’m also still pretty new here. Just got here last week, actually.”

You can see the tension seep out his shoulders after hearing that you’re one of the newer campers as he gladly sighs in relief. “I’m pretty nervous, I don’t really know what’s going on,” he lets out an emotionless chuckle. “I just found out that my dad isn’t my actual dad and that Zeus? The dude up in the sky? Is apparently my real dad.”

“Yeah,” you grimace, you still haven’t fully grasped that either. “It took awhile for me to get kinda used to things here but I also somehow feel that I belong here,” you look at him, hoping your effort of comforting him is working. “I think you’ll fit in here soon enough. It’s okay to take things slow.”

This time, San genuinely smiles. “Thanks _____.”

“By the way,” he adds in a whisper, tugging your wrist to bring you closer to him, inadvertently causing your cheeks to warm. “I don’t know much about my… dad or Greek Mythology in that matter, but isn’t he like a major dickhead—”

A thunderous clap of lightning pierces through the suddenly darkened sky, striking a tree that stood closest to the dining pavilion, erupting it in booming flames. Surprised screams break out throughout the dining campers, everyone quickly turning their heads to look at San; the most probable culprit of angering the God of the Sky that one of their trees is now on fire.

“Oh, oops,” the guilty boy winces. “Sorry.”

“San, was that you?” a voice came from behind you, requiring you to turn around to see who it is and oh– it’s the boy who was sitting at the Poseidon table; the other new camper. The raven haired boy looks at you, taking in the horrified look on your face as you resume watching the tree burn after attempting to nod at him in greeting. “Man, what’d you do this time?”

“I didn’t do anything,” the blonde boy Yeosang unfortunately calls his best friend, whines. “It’s just… maybe I said some words I shouldn’t have or whatever. Anyways, can’t you fix that? Shouldn’t you have, like, water powers or something?”

“We literally just got here, idiot,” Yeosang rolls his eyes, though he thinks it’d be pretty cool if he does end up having powers. He turns to your direction, taking the chance to talk to you now that he sees you’ve snapped out of your daze. “I’m sorry about him, he must’ve given you a hard time.”

San lets out an offended “hey!”

“No he didn’t,” you giggle. “It’s just,” you point at the still burning tree and a few campers circling it with buckets of water in hopes of putting out the fire. “It’s not everyday that you see stuff like this.”

Yeosang turns around, whistling lowly once he actually takes in the damage his best friend (his best friend’s dad, actually) has done. “Yeah, that looks pretty bad,” he says.

“Eh,” you shrug. “The Demeter kids are probably upset about it but it’s nothing they can’t fix.”

Your eyes widen, you totally forgot why you wanted to approach them in the first place. “Speaking of fixing,” you usher San out of his table and exchange proper introductions with the raven haired boy named Yeosang before dragging them by the wrists to the Apollo table. “You should really get those wounds healed. The Apollo kids here are the healers, they’ll know what to do.”

A tall boy, who Yeosang presumes to be Yunho based on your calls of his name, smoothly steps out of the table with his siblings and introduces himself to both of them. You told the healer about what you heard, that they were both hunted on the way here; hence the bruises from struggles of their escape. His eyes take in the exhausted figures of the two boys and he tells them that they should follow him to the infirmary to heal and rest up.

“Hey! Wait up!”

A boy with two-toned hair surprisingly holding a can of Diet Coke instead of his regular mug, skips to the group of four, tagging along the remaining of the boys behind him. Already exchanging greetings and introductions, the two new boys are slightly surprised at how friendly they all are but they absolutely do not mind at all, despite how they feel like their bones would crumble in exhaustion at any moment.

As the nine of them move together towards the infirmary, Wooyoung keeps bugging Yeosang with stupid questions that makes San laugh. (“Can you turn water into wine?” “If I could, wouldn’t that be blasphemy? And shouldn’t you be the one who turns things to wine?”). He’s never met anyone like them and they’re a bit odd but he thinks that he likes that.

He looks at you walking side by side with Yunho, an imposing Mingi trying to squeeze in the very small space left between you and the healer who is now glaring at his tall friend. Jongho watches from the sides, enjoying the suffering his hyung is going through and letting out amused snickers now and then. Seonghwa and Hongjoong look like they’re fighting over something, arms messily flailing against one anothers’, with Seonghwa letting out occasional squeals. San can’t tell if they’re play fighting or serious.

The blonde smiles, shoving his hands down his pockets. Staying at camp doesn’t sound all too bad now.

“I think you’ll fit in here soon enough.”

He thinks so too.

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inevitably-johnlocked · 5 months ago

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Heyyyyy any lists and recs for Victorian Johnlock?? Thxxx sm I love all the work u put into this

Hi Nonny!

You know what??? I haven't put up a new list in AGES, but I don't have personal updates of my own recs, BUT I also REALLY NEED a list for this weekend, so GUESS WHAT??? You're the ask that I'm going to just tag-search my MFL list and make a Part Two :) So PLEASE NOTE I haven't read any of these and I'm not 100 on if they are Victorian AUs or ACD Canon. I just go based on what people recced to me or what I saw tagged.

If anyone has any fics that they wuold like to suggest, please do add them below! Enjoy!

VICTORIAN AU Pt. 2 (MFLs)

See also:

Victorianlock

ACD Canon

Long ACD Canon (MFLs)

Granada Holmes Fics (MFLs)

Victorian Meets Modern Johnlock

Regency AU (TO READ) [I know it's a different era but this is so that people know I have a list for "a similar era"]

2 Bits by Ewebie (M, 717 w., 1 Ch. || TABlock/Victorianlock || Shaving Each Other, UST/URT) – It was the quiet moments. The peace behind closed doors and drawn curtains. At the end of a case. At the end of a long day. At the end of their ropes, but away from society’s prying eyes. That was the foundation upon which the rumors were spread. Part 11 of the Tumblr Shorts series

Happy birthday, Sherlock Holmes! by Holmes_WatsonACSAneroxiaDalt (G, 1,665 w., 1 Ch. || Victorian AU || Established Relationship, Love Confessions, Light Angst, First Kiss, Idiots in Love, Hurt Sherlock) – During the journey, Holmes was overcome by a million overwhelming feelings. Today is his birthday. His birthday. And Watson, dear Watson, his sun in the sky, his purpose in life, had not achieved this. Maybe he forgot, but he couldn't blame him. A story were Watson forgot the birthday of Holmes. Or not?

The first time I ever saw your face by Vanimelda4 (G, 2,164 w., 1 Ch. || 1895 Victorian AU / TABlock || PODFIC AVAILABLE || POV Sherlock, Fluff and Angst, Meta Fic) – "Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while."

The Picture of Sherlock Holmes by CarmillaCarmine (M, 3,306 w., 1 Ch. || Victorian Dorian Gray AU || Angst, Paris, London, Travel, Painting, Major Character Death, Opera, Captain John, First Meetings) – Sherlock Holmes, a rich and frivolous man, after a lifetime of debauchery finally falls in love. His heart chooses Captain Watson.

Detectives, balls and proposals by Winxhelina (T, 5,365 w., 1 Ch. || Victorian Femlock || Genderbending, Disguised Sherlock, Misunderstandings, Falling In Love) – The adventures of Miss Sherlock Holmes and her friend Miss Watson. My attempt at writing Victorian Femlock after reading way too much Jane Austen and ACD. In which there is a ball, a case, a murder and a falling in love...

The Soldier And The Demon by LipstickDaddy (G, 8,998 w., 6 Ch. || Victorian / Demon AU || Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Soldier John, Demon Sherlock, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Protective John, Protective Sherlock, Happy Ending) – Johnlock/Kuroshitsuji AU - 1879. Captain John H Watson of the Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers is dying from a near-fatal gunshot wound in the Kandahar desert; until a demon saves his life. There’s a catch, though; one day, his saviour will eat his soul.

Iris by Leloi (E, 11,302 w., 1 Ch. || Omegaverse || Time Travel, Mpreg, Infertility, Virgin Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Established Relationship, Omega Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock) –John Watson was quickly learning to hate the Victorian Era. It wasn’t just the lack of proper medical care… Although that was a rather large component. It was the filth. It was the misery and the lack of regard for human life. Ok… So maybe the lack of proper medical care was a major component. It was difficult being a 21st century medical doctor stuck with 19th century technology. There was some sort of time travel involved. The really strange part is that there was a past version of himself living with a past version of Sherlock Holmes. Ok… So maybe that wasn’t the strangest part either. He seemed to be stuck in an alternate universe.

The Reawakening of John Watson by 221b_careful_what_you_wish_for (E, 20,463 w., 14 Ch. || Historical 1800s American/Victorian AU || Artist Sherlock, Writer John, Angst with Happy Ending, Bisexual John, Period Typical Homophobia, Sensuality, Experienced Sherlock, Pining, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Love Confessions, Flirty Sherlock, Frottage, Outdoor Sex, Trust Issues, Minor Character Death, Sexual Tension, Colorado / London, Rimming, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, POV John) – Trying to escape his troubled past in England, John Watson has started a new life in the American West. When he meets the handsome artist Sherlock Holmes, a smoldering attraction is sparked, complicating his quiet, carefully guarded existence. Maybe taking a risk with Sherlock is exactly what John needs to feel alive again...

The Inferno Club by SwissMiss (E, 20,841 w., 1 Ch. || BDSM Omegaverse AU || Alpha / Alpha, Victorian Kinks, Case Fic, Public Sex, Wax Play, Pain Play, Collars) – "I'm easy to find," said the young woman. "Hell, London, gets me every time." The real story behind The Adventure of the Illustrious Client.

An Unexpected Proposal by black_tea (E, 21,699 w., 6 Ch. || Victorian Omegaverse Johncroft || Beta Sherlock, Alpha Mycroft, Omega John, Bonding, Courting, Sexism, Sexual Harassment, Protective Mycroft) – John returns home from Afghanistan to find himself in a difficult situation. It's not easy being an omega without a mate in Victorian England. Though highly competent, most can't seem to see past his status. To make matters worse, he no longer has access to the suppressants handed out by the army. However, a chance meeting puts him in contact with one Sherlock Holmes and leads to something even more unexpected. Suddenly John has the prospect of a better life, if he can only bring himself to take it.

You’ve Got Mail: A Johnlock Victorian AU by MorganeUK (G, 37,112 w., 17 Ch. || Victorian AU / You’ve Got Mail AU || Friendship, Dev. Rel.) – In 1881, Doctor John Watson, veteran of the second Afghan war, inherited a small but prosperous bookshop from his uncle. Against all likelihood, he embraced his new life joyfully and lived happily among his books and... other projects.This is, until the day a nearby store, Holmes & Brother, decided to add a book department to their already enormous store... Unable to find a way to stop his little shop from succumbing under Holmes’ expansion, Watson needs to find help! And who’s better than his dear epistolary friend! Part 6 of the Rom-com adaptations...

The Adventure of the Lost Boy by mydogwatson (T, 38,530 w., 11 Ch. || Victorian AU || Victor Trevor, Neurodiversity, Romance, Case Fic, Angst with Happy Ending, Time Jumps) – Sherlock Holmes makes his way through life as an outsider in Victorian England.

Silence by halloa_what_is_this (T, 44,993 w., 13 Ch. || The Piano Fusion || Victorian Sherlock, Dub Con, Voyeurism, Permanent Mutilation, Johniarty, Mute John) – In 1850, John is a mute young man forced to marry to save his father from indebtedness. His sister as his interpreter and his piano to keep him company, he travels to London to live with his husband James Moriarty. Without John's consent, James sells the piano to his friend Sherlock Holmes, who only asks for lessons from John in return. The lessons turn into a power play between the two when Sherlock proposes a deal: John may earn his piano back one key at a time, certain conditions attached. Part 1 of the Aborted Wings series

Always 1895 by standbygo (E, 45,901 w., 19 Ch. || Oxford Time Travel AU || Time Travel, Friends to Lovers, Case Fic, Victorian, Period-Typical Homophobia, Pining, First Kiss/Time, First Meetings, Slow Burn, Angst With Happy Ending) – Time travelling historian John Watson goes to Victorian era England to study, and meets detective Sherlock Holmes. He finds himself torn between the work he was sent to do, the exciting life of solving crimes, and the extraordinary Holmes himself.

All Our Gifts At Once, or, the Young Sea-man by tiltedsyllogism (T, 48,119 w., 9 Ch. || Victorian Little Mermaid AU || Sacrifice, Pining, Angst, Realistic Fairy Tale, Bittersweet, Botany, Gardens) – John Watson, storyteller and shipwright's son, walks way from his entire life in Portsmouth to follow the mysterious Sherlock Holmes to London.

Vows Made in Wine by love_in_mind_palace (E, 59,837 w., 16 Ch. || Victorian Handmaiden Fusion || Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, Plot Twists, Mystery, Child Abuse, Dubious Consent) – John Watson, a low born young man from the slums of London appears in the farthest corner of country to work as a valet for the young master living in the secluded mansion. Secrets, betrayal, conspiracy. A love blossoming in the most unfortunate circumstances.

The Courtesan by delightful_fear (M, 67,865 w., 20 Ch. || 1860′s Victorian / Prostitution AU || Medical Examination, Alternate First Meeting) – Desperate times call for desperate measures. John takes a job as a live-in doctor in the most exclusive brothel in London, never thinking he would fall under the spell of it's most infamous consort, Sherlock Holmes.

Concurrence by Calais_Reno (M, 70,876 w., 23 Ch. || Historical / Time Travel AU || Mental Institutions, Modern and Victorian Settings, Period-Typical Homophobia, Alternate First Meeting, First Person POV Sherlock) – “How did you come to be in this place?” I have no idea what possessed me. Perhaps the sheer exhaustion of transport had weakened my filter. Or maybe it was simply that as I looked at the young doctor sitting opposite me, his face calm and professional, but bored (Shares a flat with a mate, who is seducing his girlfriend. Down on his luck. Evidence: clothing and shoes are good quality, but worn. Had to pawn his bag, but could have gotten more for the watch. Sentimental…) I had a sudden whim to give him an interesting story. I decided that Dr John Watson would at least have something to tell his flatmate tonight when he arrived back at his shabby little flat. Or maybe his girlfriend, if she hadn’t left him yet. And the truth was even more interesting than anything I could make up. Part 1 of the Concurrence Universe series

Observations on Sentinels and Guides in Victorian London by RyuuzaKochou (T, 89,181 w., 13 Ch. || Victorian Sentinel / Guides AU || Action/Adventure, Hurt/Comfort, Romance) – A Victorian era AU where Sentinels and Guides are members of everyday society. Starring Sentinel! Holmes and Guide! Watson.

The Stories in Our Veins by victorianpining (E, 101,717 w., 29 Ch. || Dracula Crossover / Victorian / Vampire AU || Unreliable Narrator, Blood and Injury, Blood Drinking, Gaslighting, Mental Instability, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Strangers to Lovers, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Angst with Happy Ending) – You hold in your hands a leather-bound book inscribed with the title The Stories in Our Veins. No author is named by the cover. On the first page, the following passage has been written in an elegant, cursive hand: A confederate who foresees your conclusions and course of action is always dangerous, but one to whom each development comes as a perpetual surprise, and to whom the future is always a closed book, is indeed an ideal helpmate. Sherlock Holmes in “The Adventure of the Blanched Soldier,” written by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle in 1926.

Fin de Siècle Series by Calais_Reno (M, 102,149 w. across 20 works || Victorian AU || Alternate First Meeting, Friends to Lovers, Alternating POV, Misunderstandings, Period-Typicall Homophobia, Love Declarations, Grief/Mourning, Victorian Attitudes, Marriage of Convenience, True Love, Loneliness, Hurt/Comfort) – Holmes and Watson meet and commit themselves to one another, in spite of laws that make their relationship illegal. Holmes confronts Moriarty at Reichenbach hoping to end his influence in the government; he falls, but does not win. Moriarty's machine continues. While Holmes tries to make his way back to England, Watson, believing Holmes dead, suffers the consequences of their opposition to Sebastian Moran, Moriarty's successor. Finally reunited after several years, Holmes and Watson work to end the corruption that has taken over Britain's government.

Riptide Lover by jinglebell (E, 114,090 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Merfolk & Victorian AU || Mermaid Sherlock, Human John, BAMF John/Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Mild Gore, Dubious Interspecies Consent, Stockholm Syndrome, Dark Romance, Dubcon and Morality, Rough Sex, Abstract Mentions of Rape, Size Queen, Switchlock, Foot Fetish) – The year is 1866. When John becomes swept overboard, he never expects to encounter a living creature of myth. When the merman absconds with John, the lost sailor must use every tool at his disposal to convince Sherlock not to kill him. But it seems that killing John Watson is not what the deadly, beautiful creature has in mind at all...

WIPS / SERIES WIPS

Give Him a Mask by AStudyInAlgedonics (T, 10,382+ w., 2/6 Ch. || Sentinel / Guide AU || WiP || Alternate TAB, Sentinel Sherlock, Guide John, Drug Use, Not Nice Mary, Love Confessions) – Sherlock Holmes doesn't zone. Until he does, coming back from his near-exile, so hard that he strips John Watson's shields and draws him into the Victorian enigma of the Abominable Bride Emelia Ricoletti. But what he claims is a simple experiment in the mind palace proves to be far deeper waters than Sherlock meant to plumb, and if John can't break away from the script Sherlock's set him to, this strange zone may drown them both in the dark of the Reichenbach cauldron...

To Belong Series by DrFish (T, 19,400+ w. across 4 works || Series WiP || Victorian / Mythical AU || OctoJohn, Scientist Sherlock, Attempted Kidnapping, BAMF John, Protective / Possessive John, Developing Relationship, Being Lost, Size Difference, Capital Punishment, Happy Ending) – William Sherlock Scott Holmes failed to graduate the University of Cambridge class of 1877. Adrift in London, he accepts a post as assistant naturalist on a scientific expedition to the Western Pacific Ocean aboard Her Majesty's Sailing Ship Frontier. Events do not proceed quite as planned and Sherlock finds himself cruelly cast away by his shipmates. Perhaps he will find salvation in the company of a most unlikely sea creature.

20,000 leagues under the sea: A Victorian Sherlock AU by MorganeUK (G, 30,544+ w., 15/? Ch || Victorian Steampunk AU || WiP || Scientist Sherlock, Submarines) – The Holmes Brothers are living under the sea, protected from the world violence and general stupidity… Alone, with only a small crew, they explore the world inside their submersible. Perfectly satisfied and unaware of their loneliness, until they meet Captain Lestrade and Doctor Watson from the Royal Navy.

This Land We Have Chosen by redscudery (E, 86,309+ w., 16/19 Ch. || WiP || Victorian Canadian Farm AU || Farmer John, Prostate Milking/Massage, Mutual Pining, Colonialism, Demisexual Sherlock, Complicated Relationships, Slow Burns, UST, Awkwardness, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Virgin Sherlock, Canadian Politics, Angst with Happy Ending) – It’s 1866. John Watson is a former army doctor who served in India. He left the service after a mysterious traumatic incident and has been farming in the backwoods of Canada. Sherlock Holmes is an avid botanist and possible hysteric who is a very loud thorn in his brother Mycroft’s side. Since Mycroft wishes to run for Parliament during the first Canadian election, he knows he needs his troublesome younger brother out of their hometown of Carleton before he can precipitate any scandal—and what better place for a botanist than a backwoods farm? Especially when it’s run by someone who just might be able to treat Sherlock’s hysteria? Part 2 of the The Backwoods of Canada series

Untitled Nobility Series by hannahrieu (E, 95,770+w. across 4 works || Series WiP || Victorian AU || Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Dubious Consent, Angst, Mutual Pining, First Time, Friends to Lovers) – John is a servant in Halidon Hall until a tragic accident forces him to leave his home and join the army. After being wounded in battle, he returns to England and finds work as a valet for the Earl of Cornwall's second born son, Sherlock Holmes. Very lightly inspired by Mr. Bates's limp in Downton Abbey.

Fallen Through Time by susandwrites (E, 102,041+ w., 39/? Ch. || Outlander Fusion / Victorian AU || WIP || Time Travel, First Meetings, Meet-Cute, Frottage, Blow Jobs, Anal Sex/Fingering, Riding Crops, Rough Sex, Floor Sex, Breath Play, Light BDSM, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Switching, Romance, Sex to Love) – Inspired by my love of Outlander, but not exactly an Outlander AU. Sherlock Holmes, the world's only consulting detective, finds himself in Victorian London while investigating a murder. The first person he meets is Doctor John Watson, formerly of the Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers and his world is irrevocably altered.

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #my fic recs #victorian au fics #victorianlock #tablock

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emtheanxiousdragon · 1 year ago

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Our Hæth: A Wanderhome ARG

Ok so if you are any sort of game designer, whether that be a programmer for a mobile app, an artist for an indie TTRPG, or a top-tier producer at a AAA-game studio, you should read Reality is Broken by Jane McGonigal, it inspires you to make games that don’t just form digital communities or entertain, but allow a deeper connection to your real life.

And one game that I think, with a twist, could really fit McGonigal’s idea is Wanderhome, the excellent pastoral RPG by tumblr’s very own @jdragsky . This game is beautiful, simple, and a tool for telling these lovely stories about anthropomorphic travelers exploring a recovering society and finding themselves along the way.

Now, let me introduce my idea, tentatively titled Our Hæth: A Wanderhome ARG.

You make a Wanderhome character, just like in a typical game. You also make a separate Wanderhome profile that represents yourself. (this can be your actual Wanderhome character if you want to take on an alternate persona). This secondary Wanderhome character doesn't actually travel the Hæth. They represent your journey in the real world. Your second character's playbook should fit yourself and what you hope to get from this experience. My secondary character will be a Peddler, because I want to grow my personal career.

Then you get connected to a Hæth. These are shared worlds/servers that begin like all Wanderhome games (at the start of Tillsoil very soon after the end of the war) and progress from there. You can start with other players or begin on your own and find others later.

When you wish to travel to a new area, instead of randomly deciding what it should be, you base it on your current location. It can be as simple as your bedroom or as grand as the Great Wall of China! I’ll show you what I mean with where I am now.

A beautiful pond, right? Let’s turn it into a spot in the Hæth! Our first nature is based on a literal take of the area. I’m by a pond, so the first nature will be Lake! The second nature is more metaphorical; based on what you know about your location, choose a nature that describes its personality. A lot goes on around this pond, so I’ll pick Carnival. The third nature should describe the place as it is when you arrive. The calm nature of the pond today means the third nature is Field. Build the location with the rules of each nature, combined with the traits of the season, and you’ve made a Place!

In Our Hæth, each location is permanently saved into the world you created it in. If other players want to visit this location rather than create a new one, they’ll replace the third nature and the seasonal traits and set off! They can see what you’ve written about the place and the adventures you’ve had here. If you know them in real life, you can share what the real-world inspiration is. If not, you can discuss as much about it as you feel comfortable sharing.

Once you're in a Place, great! Start playing Wanderhome. If you're alone, write down what your traveler does in this place. If you're with friends, get together in person and roleplay it out, or chat together over Discord or your online forum of choice. Their characters may travel with you for a while or your paths may diverge and reconnect later. Just remember what happens so you can share it as part of your character's story. When you make a Kith, go through the regular Kith creation process and add them to your Hæth. If other players visit this Place later, they may meet your kith and will want to know what happened.

The other big ARG element of this version of Wanderhome comes with using tokens. When your character does something to create a token, you need to do something to make a token in real life. Have a list of what different actions in Wanderhome mean for you in real life. For example, when my character Camper gives away something he holds dear, that means I have to complete some professional networking. Your token action should be challenging or good for you. Change your token action as your challenges and needs change. Make them fit your life and your goals.

Take a break to complete your token action, or write it down for after the session. You won't be able to spend your real-world token until you complete your task. Once that's done, the next time your character spends a token, you can spend one too! Your token rewards are something positive to reward yourself for putting in the effort and caring for yourself, your relationships, or the world. In my Hæth, when Camper keeps someone safe from the difficulties of the world, I get to take a nap rather than work!

The months can change in small groups when you agree to change them. In bigger groups, you may set a real-world date for the change in the months. Ask the month's question to yourself and your Wanderhome character. Consider your answer a "yes" regardless of which one of you says so. When the time comes for the seasons to change, set up a party with others in your Hæth or throw your own private celebration. Just as the holiday marks a moment of personal growth for your character, take a major step forward with your own goals. As Camper celebrates the new year, I'm going to start searching for a summer internship. I'll adapt my token actions and rewards as needed, and I'll continue playing.

So long as you have Wanderhome, you can play this game. You can keep track of your Hæth in a notebook, on a google doc, whatever. My perfect version of this project would be a little website where players can join different Hæths, watch their world grow on a virtual map, see all the information neatly organized online, and connect to a wide range of people in the Wanderhome community.

Thoughts?

#wanderhome #jay dragon #possum creek games #arg #wanderhome rpg

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beloved-cat-gremlin · 9 months ago

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This post isn't meant to upset or attack anyone! Please keep that in mind when reading this.

I know I'm already on the chopping block alone for the fact that I'm talking about Hazbin Hotel in the first place.

And I know this kind of discussion has been done many times on Tumblr already. And yes this is about the very much talked about topic of "Alastor and him being AroAce".

Or at the very least Asexual (but it's kinda assumed from Rosie's joke that Aromantic is also hinted at).

Before I start I wanna say that it's totally OK if you ship Alastor out of good old fashion fun or because you wanna explore character and/or ship dynamics with him. And the same goes for people who ship him because they want to explore their own experiences or orientation through a fictional character. This especially goes for anyone who identifies as Graysexual and/or Grayromantic.

It's alright if you want to explore yourself through fictional characters. As long as it's done with the thought in mind that it's not meant to erase a character's actual and canon orientation.

However as an AroAce who doesn't experience any romantic and sexual attraction whatsoever it still feels kind of discerning that people are still trying to push the card of "well AroAce people can still love!"

Yes!

That is true!

But not for all of us!

And it felt so refreshing to finally have such a widely popular character -and a fan favorite at that- to be described as AroAce and very heavily implied to be on the romance- and sex-repulsed side.

And people throwing the argument "oh but him being the one character to be oriented as AroAce is harmful to the community. Cause it portrays us as loveless and evil beings who are incapable of love of any kind!" is such a dumb and sorry excuse.

Because Alastor in the show is very much capable of love, just not the romantic kind.

He and Rosie have one of the best portrayed friendships I've seen in a while. It's especially dear to me because people don't make their relationship to be that of a family one. Rosie and Al are just friends. Best friends. And that's that.

So to have the only (as of now known) AroAce character in the show be the one to actually have a very strong planotic friendship shows that he isn't a heartless monster.

All I'm asking is that if Alastor is going to be in fact fully confirmed AroAce within the show; please! Just let us, who don't feel any attraction both romantic and sexual, or us who are romance- and sex-repulsed AroAce people have a character of our own as well. Don't try to push it that "he can still love" just so you can erase AroAce culture and representation from media.

It's already hard enough in real life for many of us who identify as AroAce or any term that falls into the spectrum.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #aroace #aromantic #asexual #long post #rambles #no art

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foxes-that-run · 7 months ago

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Sorry if this question has been answered a thousand times! But yes, I do really want to know where T was April 29th!!! Can you give more information on this story?

There are previous posts on it in 2016 timeline, song analysis' for I did something bad, and @tameimpala222's post on Calvin Harris' Ole.

Do you really want to know where I was April 29?

This high infidelity line could be as much to fans as to Calvin. Like Dear Reader, it says to fans how some see Taylor in a narrow idealised way

OK, but what happened?

Set up:

Taylor and Calvin had been on pretty rocky ground. There has been rumours that he had been unfaithful, that Taylor was jealous of yachtgate and that Calvin was jealous of that jealousy.

Taylor won Album of the Year on 16 February and in Miss Americana said she felt alone and had no one she could call. (21 Minutes)

Harry and Kendall started the year with Yachtgate 6 January. Kendall was in Europe and didn’t go to Harry’s birthday party on the 21st and they arrived and left separately Jeff’s birthday 23 January so hendall was over then. They weren’t seen together for months apart from a pap walk that promoted KUWTK.

Harry was in LA at the same time. He wore this blue Hawaii st Laurent shirt on his 22nd birthday, also the day of the feeling 22 tweet which went viral. Taylor tumblr likes Holy Ground lyrics about falling apart. Taylor was in LA but not seen. 2 weeks later he wrote Sweet Creature which is a love song, but also references seeding doubt in a love interests' partners mind.

At this time, Calvin also started writing a diss track (Ole) about a guy (Harry) who ignores his GF (Kendall) for someone else (Taylor) who is a fake girlfriend to the subject (Calvin), the video shades Hendall and Haylor.

28 February - 29 April

Harry and Taylor then started hinting at hooking up, or wanting to. On 28 February Taylor looks stunning and alone at the Vanity Fair Oscar Party, Harry tweets Elvis lyrics about not being over an ex and posted a colour photo to instagram (it had been B&W since OOTW came out unless he saw Taylor).

Taylor and Calvin posted about the 1 year anniversary a week later and spent 3 days with backgrid in the Bahamas. Harry went back to London and looked grumpy getting a parking ticket that week. :/

But then it seemed back on 25 March when Taylor and Harry return to LA the same day 👀 and are seen around LA separately.

On the 3rd April Taylor and Calvin are hostile at the iHeartRadio awards, blinds they fought in the pap walk.

The end for Tayvin was at Coachella/Bleachella/TIWYCF when Calvin didn't give Taylor credit for This is What you Came for. A year later there was a blind item that TIWYCF was about who Taylor was having an affair with (in hindsight it’s really Haylor), to me this helps explain why it went so bad over it.

Harry again tweeted Cars lyrics about being with an ex that you love no matter what And then finally, as well known Taylor went to Gigi's birthday party on the 28th, and did not show up for promo for TIWYCF, neither Harry or Taylor are seen on the 29th.

The next Day Harry is still in LA in a walk of shame to a Gym and Calvin goes on Radio to say she isn't working.

Alas it didn't work out for either couple, Tayvin imploded. Harry went to Europe to shoot Dunkirk then record HS1 and Taylor was looking for someone to be with her all the time and publicly move on from the Tayvin disaster. You know the rest.

For bonus the promo Taylor was a no show was possible this interview with Calvin had Nick Grimshaw, AKA Harry's close friend and long term maker of lighthearted Haylor jokes, in Calvins house on April 29 2016!

youtube

Later references

What makes this and interesting comment on Taylors fans thinking they know everything is that it wasn't known.... Were it not for Ole and Kiwi's videos that is!

Later in 2016 Calvin released Ole that references outfits Taylor, Kendall and Harry all wore in this period and Calvin posted to instagram wearing Harry's exact shirt from February.

Harry recreated Taylors look from this party in the protagonist of the Kiwi music video, which refers to when Taylor said at 2015 Oscar’s she was “going home to the cats” and Calvin (prick) "When she's alone, she goes home to a cactus (Uh) In a black dress, she's such an actress"

And finally, for irony and lols:

On 29 April 2017 (the 1 year anniversary of this high infidelity) Harry got papped wearing the same shirt.

In September Capital FM used the photo Calvin's used to troll Harry and Taylor in an article calling him a 'baller'. Harry has a leaked song from this era, Super Pretty with the line "Said you're happier with that big baller that we both knew growing up"

And it still continues in when Harry's friend Roman Kemp presented Calvin with Harry Styles Bathwater at the 2024 Brits.

Joe Alwyn, the Bowery Gastropub & Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk "reshoots"

A Reddit and Toe-Tumber version of this story is:

Joe was in LA for BLLHW reshoots and was with co-star Garrett Hedlund, who's friends with Caleb Followill who is married to Lily Aldridge who was at Gigi's party where we know Taylor was. There is a pub named the Bowery Gastropub on Sunset and Vine so of course Taylor met Joe there because 6 degrees of separation. It somehow makes sense that Tayvin continued and Hiddleswift happened and that she wrote in the lover journal that Toe started dating 3 months before January.

Issues with this story:

This story hinges on a screenshot from an office assistants LinkedIn claiming to have worked freelance on reshoots for the film for 2 months March and April 2016. If you search the words in the screenshot the Linkedin profile does say that. However if you look at profiles for editors, videographers and producers on the film they all ended mid-2015. Perhaps the freelance office assistant was working on a different film, or listed the wrong task.

Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk had no reshoots. They had no budget for them and shot specifically to avoid them. It was also not shot in LA.

Footage for the film had already been debuted on 16 April 2016. They were definitely not still shooting a low budget film 2 weeks later when it was being screened and was released in November

Joe was in London on 20 March 2016. There is no reason to think Joe was in LA.

Joe and Garrett Hedlund did attend the Met Gala - however as a C/B lister Garrett would not have a plus one, more likely he was Lily's plus one!

Caleb Followill, and his brother and bandmate Nathan Followill go way back with Harry - Nathan has a matching tattoo of the other half of Harry's broken heart tattoo! Harry (and Taylor) were at a Calab Followill's 2015 birthday party when they were last seen together. If the Followill connect/ Bowery gastropub is true at all, it was not a no-name friend of a friend who was in London! 😂 It was a BFF who was in LA and flirting with his ex-GF.

This mental gymnastics to fit Joe into a story that three artists have described is a good example of how swifties want to keep Taylor in a defined perfect box, which she wants out of. It reminds me of this quote she gave Rolling Stone in 2014, about the snowboarding accident and OOTW:

"People think they know the whole narrative of my life, I think maybe that line is there to remind people that there are really big things they don’t know about."

#April 29 #2016 #high infidelity #Toe #Bowery Gastropub #Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk #Taylor swift #Harry Styles #Haylor #Calvin Harris #Tayvin #Start of 2016 #haylor anniversary #haylor anniversaries

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valarioncy · 6 months ago

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Ko-Fi, Commisions, and Debt! Oh My!

Hello Hollowers and non-Hollowers. I @ahyesthesufferingoftvteens (Cursi) am collaborating with Valarioncy on this post to deliver a message to those still following the both of us, and to those that may follow us in the future!.

We currently have a joint Ko-Fi Account and are accepting donations and commisions! access to our Ko-Fi is down below all the long-winded explanation! But first...

Who are you guys?

Cy - Heeeeeey, it's ya boi Cy. This here is my Tumblr account. I'm an artist and writer, autistic, asexual, and plural. I have interest in all kinds of media, animation in particular. Writing is my main passion in terms of what I like to do creatively, but I'm not very capable of doing writing commissions. Art commissions though, I'm able to do! Provided it doesn't involve designing; I'm not able to do that at this time, although I would like to in future. :0 (Seriously, go to Cursi for anything involving design!) I've been primarily doing artwork for the Hollow, which can be found on my Instagram, although I haven't been active there for a while. I also specialize in OCs and SFW furry art, plus animals of many kinds. My art style is very graphic-novel-esque, with a predominantly Canadian influence. (No, I am not nor have I ever been Canadian, I don't know how this happened.) Feel free to commission me; I'll specify exactly what I'm doing in one of the fine sections below! ^_^

Cursi - I'm the Cursed Hollower you all know and love! I'm ok with any pronouns and my gender is whatever pisses you off the most (Genderqueer)! While I'm not as much of an artist as Cy, I pride myself in my creative writing and character development/design! If you want to know how my writing is, I'd suggest looking into my latest fanfiction: Come Sweet Death, in The Hollow (Cartoon) Category on A03...don't look at anything else, it's severely outdated and absolute trash.

So what's the news, Cy and Co?

Me, Cursi, and Valarioncy are two creatives/artists that primarily create content for The Hollow, as most of you may know.

We also like to make original projects. I'm trying to whip up an original series based off of my The Hollow Magical Girl AU, and Cy has mutliple different projects. One particular series we're working on: Green's Academy, is being worked on by both of us plus a third party.

Unfortunetly, there's a problem that's been holding us back. At the current moment, me and Cy are couch-surfing and trying to look for jobs to sustain our needs and wants and, potentially, get ourselves our own abode! This is predictably difficult due to our neurodivergancies, but without the second problem we have, this isn't are main woes. We have food stamps, so we're not going hungry.

The other FAR BIGGER problem is that I, Cursi...am $1,600 in credit card debt, and I recently missed my payment this month because I have only ten bucks in my bank account to keep it alive.

How the heck did you gain so much debt?

Now you're probably wondering how on earth I GOT $1,600 dollars in credit card debt. To make a long story short:

I flew to Valarioncy's state to help them with their homelessness situation with a healthy sum of about 3,000 dollars.

One of the other friends we had with us turned out to be severely abusive and held us down from escaping such a horrible situation.

Now that that friend is gone, our other friend is in a group home, and me and Cy are slightly more stabilized, the damage left behind is severe...especially on my poor credit card that had to extend our unwanted motel stays.

Needless to say I'm an absolute mess over this. I don't like being in debt, at all. Cy is trying to calm me down but I'm clinging onto my sanity for dear life.

But yeah, because of this debt that affects both of us, considering we're basically family at this point, we need cash. And because it's hard to get a job, we aren't getting an influx of cash...you can probably see where this is going now.

I like your creative works! How can I help?

Well you're just in luck, buddy-o. Me and Cy have created a joint Ko-Fi Account! We're accepting commissions AND donations! Ain't that just great!

Hey Cy! Tell us about your commision prices! --------------------

Cy: Right now, I'm pretty much up to doing digital flat-colored/minimal shading busts and full-bodies with transparent backgrounds. I get busts done a whole lot faster than full-bodies but I'm capable of doing full-bodies so I'm gonna include them! Pretty much all I need is a good reference for the character. I can do human, animal, and furry, SFW only.

-------------------- Thank you Cy! Go ahead and personally DM Cy for a commision if you're interested!

As for me, I'm open to ghost-writing and lore-development for the small small price of...um...$3? maybe $5? I know Cy will get on me for potentially underselling myself but they do that to themselves. Hehe. (PLEASE PAY THEM MORE THAN 3 to 5 BUCKS!!!!!!! -Cy)

We're also accepting donations. Any amount would be of great help! Even just $1 will make our day, seriously. $1 is more than we normally get nowadays!

Of course, if you can't donate, that's totally fine! Please spread the word and reblog this post and the many posts me and Cy make! You can pay us with some good classic feedback-dopamine!

One Last Link to our Ko-Fi!

Thank you for listening! Thanks for the support!

#the hollow #the hollow netflix #the hollow cartoon #netflix cartoons #cartoons #digital art #writing #creative writing #ko fi support #ko fi commissions #donations #debt #art commisions #art commissions open #commisions #artists on tumblr #writers on tumblr #furry art #sfw furry

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fantomette22 · 12 days ago

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Hello how you doing? ^-^

I have not checked tumblr in months but its always wonderful to see you to keep the gehrmaria space alive.. and I want to ask if you have hcs for how they both behave when the other is sick and needing care? Please and thank you dear friend ~

Hi anon! :D thank you a lot for the ask and checking in! You always put a smile on my face :) (Idk if you got other social media too that would be a pleasure to chat with you!)

I’m doing fine I would say. That depends the days.

And yeah I know I should do more on them! ejfssdhkfeihfkdskn

But yes I think you’ll be happy to know I have quite a few headcanons and ideas about this specific subject!

Well aside the AU where everyone is kinda alive and happy and they share a house, and sometimes got sick here*, I feel that in a more canon compliant setting they would rarely got sick thanks to the old blood. (*So yeah in AU they would be very sweet and patient and take care of each other when the other got sick for sure!)

Still with the hunt and all they would get hurt often and you can't always use old blood for every little scrape you got. You know you need to be careful with using old blood and all ;)

So at first I imagined when Maria got her first blood transfusion she stayed in a coma for maybe like 2 days. And her friends relay themselves at her bedside. So Gehrman did that for a huge part. (won't share all the context here but it's after facing off the keeper of the old lords! It was a a huge thing for her but she still decide to continue on the 3rd floor and Ludwig and Gehrman had to drag her back after getting KO by a gel enemy (you know the slime that fall on you)... she shouldn't have overdo it...

They did save each other lives from death situations more than once too! Even going as to carry the other on their back to get to safety! So yeah they got other others! (Yes Maria did that for Gehrman too!)

I always imagined Laurence was mainly the one to patch up and heal the old hunters who got hurt (logic) but as he got more busy and can't be everywhere, I feel they would all take care of one another and especially Maria and Gehrman being the more at ease with it (to heal the others).

I hc of course Laurence as a doctor or even surgeon (+priest lol) he is the best at sewing back skins for exemple but followed by Gehrman who's the second best! (I mean he can sew tissue very well so. Apparently it's not that far off! So now I imagined they trained together at Byrgenwerth on tissue and skins. Help ekdbd)

And then Maria learn it too. So, I imagined more than once, they might have sew back each other skins too! So yeah.

I had this silly idea... that show that they trust each other on that quite well. Like one day they are patching up, cleaning the scratches they got. It's just the 2 of them at the workshop. And at some point Maria's like : "hey hm... I got a pretty bad scar on my back hm would that be alright if you stitch it up?"

"Oh euh sure no problem."

"No I mean I need to take my shirt off... does that bother you?"

"OH! Hm... well we can wait for a nurse if that bother you..."

"No it's fine its it's you it's just... I understand if..that bother you...."

"Well... if that doesn't bother you... it's hm fine with me I think.."

"Alright..."

And it's awkward for like 2 mins before they start it. I mean it's fine she have her back to him and holding her shirt in front of her so it's ok. (wtf I am even talking about help)

Also Gehrman always have so tea or infusion for any kind of pain so he gave her a few remedy and receipt he have. But he love to prepare it too.

I also imagined that very occasionally Gehrman still got phantom pain in his leg/foot. Sometimes it's just slithy bothering or annoying but at times the pain is just too much. He can't do anything, just sitting there, gritting his teeth, almost on the verge of tears... waiting for it to pass. Somehow the better thing that smooth him is Maria presence. Talking to him and being with him. it helped the pain pass and being more beareble. (He never show that side of him to anyone but to her he did. They are here to help each other at when they're really not well. He did that for her too in the past until well.... When there were all the drama with Cainhurst and all for exemple.)

And last little thing hm. Still need to figure details but before she passed away, and clearly wasn't at her best, I imagined that maybe Gehrman did take care of her a bit. Making sure she sleeps and eat and all. Making sure she could donation and her own again. she did but well... you know how that end later. And he became slowly a giant mess without her presence...)

Sorry that's clearly not sweet so let's get back to the making soup and tea for each others and something 😭 patching up and telling the other to be careful not overdo it. Yeah that's better.

-----

Also I did try to draw something quick the other day too. It’s very messy I don’t think I did a very good job here. I didn’t wanted to post it at first.. But I figure it would still be nice to share to you and maybe others would still appreciate it as well! (I get what's like to be desperate for content and taking every lil bit so I can at least provide that!)

So there it is ^^

Have Gehrman patching her up and Maria calming him from phantom pain.

#fantomette22art #maria & gehrman #gehrmaria #kinda #bloodborne headcanons #my asks #anon asks #bloodborne #lady maria of the astral clocktower #gehrman the first hunter

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wyked-ao3 · 2 months ago

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can you give us the origin story behind tkopdr? what inspired you to write the story? where did the idea come from? what motivated you to put pen to paper and actually write it?

miss tou wyked <3

Thank you for the ask @thecomfywriter

Origin story- a varying amount of things that interested me including lore/mythology, several weird dreams and pirates all merged together to craft this... storyline

Where did the idea come from-. Not particularly certain I had some OC's in mind for over seven years... finally figured out why they wanted to belong to.....then about 50 more showed up knocking on the door 0_o

What inspired it- probably my internet in pirates of the Caribbean (not even technically a favorite like lol) and pirate queens and leaders that made huge impacts on the pirates throughout history. Grace O'Mally and Anne bonny both have a special place in my heart. So does Stede Bonnet

What motivated me to type it out since I don't hand write anything legitable- well I started in fanfiction and made some friend who have been great support to me and they inadvertently motivated me to actually write out my series versus leaving it in my head and I have made a few friend since then who have continued to motivate me when I was feeling down.

So in book one I'm warning there will be a long as thank you page.... with several pen names on it considered this a warning (this is not the speech getting used but... decided to include one in the warning)

@lillybaaaka- who is the first friend I made on Tumblr and a fellow fanfiction writer (I love your work...) who taught me a lot about writing. 🫂

@adhdprincess a friend who taught me a few things about punctuation and who writes the last of us fanfiction and another friend I made shortly after joining Tumblr and has been a fun person to talk to about wips. 🫂

@evilwriter-originals who is also writing their first novel and fanfiction although the novels a wip if you like whump I would check it out. 🫂 Also they write httyd fanfiction and original stories here

@the-golden-comet who is a dear friend and has been super kind, and supportive and has a pirate story as well, they have been a huge motivation to continue my story 🫂

@gioiaalbanoart who is my shovel buddy and a dear friend, who has enthusiastically asked questions and has got to hear several rants about charaters along with golden lol.. She has a wip I'm super excited(the scarred angel) about and is my beta reader who has been really amazing (thank you so much!!) 🫂

@tragedycoded my dearest eldritch friend who popped out of the murky swamps of Tumblr and made me realize that perhaps people would like Braith after all....(I was half convinced I'd be the only one to like that oc lol) Tragedy also has a wonderful weird western story also you are great to complain to about unruly OC's...or perhaps I just like hearing more about Royston 🤔 🫂 who along with golden and jev convinced me to toss the tree people back into the book (y'all are also getting to hear some biology behind that soon 😈 ok as soon as I figure it out completely.)

@jev-urisk who I may not have know the longest out of the group of friends but I value your input greatly, also you and golden motivated me to make certain scenes longer. Lol 🫂 your wip seven circles is one I'm super excited about.

@thecomfywriter a friend who has definitely shown interest in my story and has earned the title Amon's biggest fan... despite not knowing him 😑 lol. 🫂 Who had also shown support thank you (she is publishing her novel soon)

@thatuselesshuman @gioiaalbanoart @lychhiker-writes @thecomfywriter @evilwriter37

@saebasanart @the-golden-comet @mauannacreates @kind-lion @alinacapellabooks

@kuebiko-writing @kaeru483 @differentnighttale @theink-stainedfolk @unstableunicornsofasgard

@mysticstarlightduck @demon-sneeze @an-indecisive-nerd @smellyrottentrees @honeybewrites

@pheonix358 @the-letterbox-archives

#tpkodr #the pirate king of deaths redemption #TPCG #The pirate's cursed god series #Answered ask #Inspiration #Thank y'all

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an-idiot-in-fandoms · 1 year ago

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CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE WAY WE TALK ABOUT THE MEMBERS OF MCR???

A-FUCKING-TTENTION. I WOULD LIKE TO ADDRESS SOMETHING.

as my followers may know i am a giant mcr stan. i love their music. i think most of the band are good people. however, something came to my attention.

i haven't made it a secret that i am NOT a fan of Lindsey Way, Gerard's wife, who is a racist, pedophile apologist. learning about her being a giant piece of shit made me very sad to acknowledge that if Gerard is willing to not only marry her, but use the reunion tour as also an opportunity to uncancel his dear precious wife or some bullshit, then he's not obviously the sharpest tool in the shed when it comes to race and racism in general. the fact that they even endorsed and was a fan of MSI, a "shock humour" band, which used slurs to get attention (which is fucking pathetic by the way), says a lot already. perhaps it speaks to the rock scene's general tolerance for racism at the time in the 2000s, but it wasn't the 1800s. Jimmy Urine was still a white man using the n-word at full volume, and profiting off of it during his concerts and releasing his music.

and maybe shut the fuck up if you're going to call me a "snowflake" about it, because chances are you're white, and you have no fucking clue how dangerous this rhetoric can be towards POC, who have to put up with the normalisation of slur use that the band encourages. i am a POC, and i find the fact that he used that language for money and fame absolutely disgusting. the whole band is disgusting. they can rot in hell.

anyway.

i came across a blog, not going to say which one, but one where it called out Lindsey Way. i was like "ok cool someone else who can use critical thinking in this fandom and doesn't just blindly support Gerard even though he's still definitely not the goddamn messiah". so i go on a scroll through their blog. they were a big fan of Frank, and i respect that, Frank deserves all of his flowers and more.

and then it got weird.

i came across posts where they speculated on the dynamic of the band. and a lot of things were spoken about, where they talked about Gerard being manipulative towards Frank, and how Frank didn't like going on the American leg of the tour during the reunion, and how, basically, they weren't friends, and how Gerard wasn't a good person.

the point is - there was A LOT of speculation. it made me upset to be reading it because i felt as though i'd been punched in the face, reading all this stuff about a guy i look up to partially. i sort of fell into a rabbit hole scrolling through their tumblr, getting more depressed, feeding into the logic that i could never truly feel happy about liking mcr again, reading about all of these theories, and---

hold the phone.

did you read that?

THEORIES.

it occurred to me that these were THEORIES. and the way they were demonising certain people, such as putting down Ray in certain posts to make way for Frank, made me realise that there's a problem with this fandom and how people like to assume what happens with the band members' personal life, and how they interact with each other. people like to speculate in this fandom. like, a lot.

i'll assume it's partially due to how most of the band don't shed a lot of light on their personal lives, only really Frank and Mikey are active on social media, usually showing appreciation for their families/or Frank's countless side-projects (which are all great btw, go listen to Parachutes again). so a lot of the fandom turn to speculation, to come up with these theories that "oh there's in-fighting", or "Gerard is secretly an evil genius who manipulates the whole band".

these are real people. Gerard isn't a saint, despite what some people may believe (cough, girlgerard, cough), but what we don't have to do is start making up bullshit about them being a certain way with no evidence. it's all speculation. and it's demeaning, not only to Frank and Gerard, who've probably had enough with the rumours about them over the years, but for Mikey and Ray as well.

these people aren't your friends. they're not some mystical beings shrouded in darkness that you have to find everything out about either. they are people in a band.

going too deep into speculation robs them of their autonomy. it makes everyone in the fandom look like creeps as well. it's horrible to see, and it takes away the real importance of critical thinking.

you can think critically about Gerard for marrying and excusing a racist woman, because there is EVIDENCE of her being racist. there is EVIDENCE of her being a pedophile apologist. that brings up questions about his own views on race, and how much he's willing to excuse, if he could love someone who willingly takes part in racism.

you can't do the same for Frank and Gerard's relationship. we know JACKSHIT about that. they have never said anything negative pertaining to each other in interviews, whatever "beef" people have made up between them is entirely manufactured by the fandom's overactive imagination. it's like a dead-dove fanfic on AO3 for fuck's sake, where Gerard is tagged as an asshole.

i'm aware it is only a small proportion of people who do this. but the extent to which they do it is honestly shocking. so i got pissed off.

we don't need to know everything about what happens with the band members. Frank has LS Dunes. Mikey has his family. who the fuck knows what Ray and Gerard are doing.

(now, no one's complaining about the lack of Ray on social media, but when people see a picture of Gerard's hand they flip out and beg for a face reveal - but no one's ready for that convo...)

point is: let them be. work with what you get. there's no need to make up things to make it all interesting, to create conflict - you've got that with the heavily problematic connection to MSI. evidence is key. you do not need to analyse these people like they're fictional characters.

because they are PEOPLE. and people are neither completely good or bad, they are usually in the grey area.

#mcr #my chemical romance #gerard way #frank iero #ray toro #mikey way #fandom bullshit #mcr return #lindsey way #lynz way #no way lynz way #fuck msi

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cobragardens · 1 year ago

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Self-Therapy in the Form of an Open Letter to Neil Gaiman and My Fellow Ineffables

Dear Ineffables, and Dear @neil-gaiman

I want to talk about Good Omens for a sec, ok? You are not obligated to listen! But if you want to listen, I have a Thing I need to say. And it's important to me and I have a Tumblr, so you can see where this is headed.

I know Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship, book and show, is primarily about the absurdity and tragedy and miraculousness and contagiousness of being human. I know it's about wanting friendship and cake instead of victory and ashes, and I love that. I know it did not start out as an intentionally or unequivocally queer story, and I know that neither the queerness nor the Christianity is the main theme of S1 or the book. And I think those are all good things: one of the big strengths that makes Good Omens so remarkable and so charming is its lightness of touch.

But Crowley did not start out as a demon, and Aziraphale did not start out as a butter-smooth liar, and they are neither of them the angel the other knew, and there are reasons for that. And S2 starts discussing those reasons, and now Crowley and Aziraphale have shared a very human kiss and have started a more overt phase of their ongoing conversation about what they are to each other. So one of the things we need to talk about is what it’s like to love the wrong person in a world like the world of Good Omens.

And I feel like I have some (very small) amount of expertise in this field. I do not have the skill as a writer to tell you what that was like to grow up Christian and deeply in love with my (also female) best friend in Colorado Springs, Colorado, the evangelical Christian Mecca of the United States. But I did it--or, rather, it happened to me--so I'm the person who has to write about it now.

It was Before Ellen. Homosexual sex was against the law in around half of U.S. states. Only one state (Rhode Island, which I am not convinced actually exists) had a law prohibiting discrimination against LGB people in housing, services, or employment. One U.S. state—my state, Colorado—amended its state constitution to prohibit prohibiting discrimination. Same-sex marriage did not exist. Same-sex couples could not adopt children. Being any flavor of queer could cost you custody in family court of any children you did have.

Queer young-adult novels did not exist. Movies and tv shows with queer characters did not exist unless they were serial killers or dying of AIDS. Safe-sex education did not exist, the LGBTQ section of the bookstore did not exist. Social media did not exist, the Internet was in its infancy (I was typing up papers in AppleWorks on an Apple IIe), smartphones did not exist. Porn was in magazines your friend’s older brother or uncle kept under his mattress.

The guy everybody in school thought was gay got beat up daily. The girls I'm not sure about. I only ever saw two girls/women who were out before I was 28 and met an openly lesbian woman in a university class.

In Colorado Springs, bumper stickers for Colorado for Family Values and Focus on the Family, both headquartered in the city, were common. Crosses and ichthys decals proliferated. There were only a few “God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve” stickers, but “Marriage = One Man + One Woman," or the same message in Ladies and Gents toilets symbols (with a pair of ladies and a pair of gents crossed out) were a regular sight on the backs of cars every day, every drive, my whole life there.

This was a world where there was one very specific God, who has one very rigid Plan, and whose Agents and Enemies fight each other for the eternal souls of every human being. And every player on the board was clear about this.

I was 12 when my dad and I met two women on a hiking trail and, after we all said hello and they three had chatted a bit and the women had walked on, he asked me if I had "gotten any spiritual witness about them." He told me he suspected they were lesbians.

I was 14 when I burst into tears and shouted at my dad when he spoke viciously of the two gay men who had come into his place of work earlier in the day. He called them “flaming” and “faggots.” I told him we were Christians and we were not hateful about people in that way. I didn’t know what the word faggot meant, not for sure (I picked up the meaning of flaming from his imitations), but I could tell it meant they were people who did awful things, and that he hated them.

I had never seen my dad like that before, hating someone. I had never heard him speak that way about anyone.

I was 16 when I rode in the back seat of our next-door neighbors’ Ford Focus on the way to Bible study and listened to the handsome Christian newlyweds up front discuss how awful it was that gay and lesbian couples were now allowed to adopt children in the state of New Jersey. It was bad, they said, that children could find homes with queer people “because children learn from their parents.”

I was 17 when 2 straight men beat and tortured Matthew Shepard and left him tied to a split-rail fence on the side of a road 3 hours north of Colorado Springs as a warning to the rest of us. A scarequeer.

A joke in poor taste, you may feel, this little pun. It is a pun, but it's not a joke.

One of Shepard’s murderers used the gay panic defense in court. In the U.S. the gay panic defense is one of reduced responsibility: a man cannot be held fully legally responsible for murdering another man if he claims he thought his victim was gay and making a pass at him. Because, under U.S. law, it is considered common for men to go temporarily insane and murder men they think may be gay and making a pass at them. I have rewritten this paragraph five times and that is the absolute least bananas I can make this sound. It is real and it is still a thing.

I was also 17 when Pastor Luis, the head of my church, preached in sermon about a member of the congregation who had fallen in love with another woman. He told us firmly: "She is no longer a lady. She is a lesbian."

He refused to counsel or marry them, services he insisted upon performing for the heterosexual couples among his congregants. He said he told the woman and her fiancee that they and their sin were not welcome in his house of God. He told us, the ones left, that we were not to contact the ejected woman or continue any friendships with her.

It was a small church, only about 60 people. Pastor Luis looked right into my eyes and held the eye contact with me (other peoole turned to look) when he said, "And if you don't agree with that, you are not welcome here either. You can leave now and never come back."

I did. For 10 years after that, I thought God had told Pastor Luis about me. That Pastor Luis had gotten the same "spiritual witness" off me that my dad had gotten off the 2 women we met backpacking. That he somehow knew—that any Christian might know if they listened, if they sniffed carefully enough. The smell of evil, I thought, must linger on me.

I was 18 when I got my first tattoo. My parents were relieved when I told them that’s all it was. "We thought you were going to tell us you were pregnant, or gay," they said.

I was 19 when a trans woman at a coffee shop told me about how she'd been fired as a substitute teacher from the biggest school district in the state. She didn't pass, so she dressed as a man when working. One day she made the mistake of wearing a women's button-down shirt (with the buttons on the left, not the right), and someone noticed and complained.

I was also 19 when my boyfriend's parents became concerned that he might be gay. (He had gotten his ears pierced and dyed his clipper cut pink while away at college.) As Christians his parents were against premarital sexual activity of any kind, including masturbation or sexual desire, so my bf couldn’t tell them how he knew he wasn’t gay, and for over a year they wouldn’t believe him. His mother bought some books from Family Christian Booksellers, the biggest Christian publisher in the U.S., about how as a Christian she should respond to her child’s queerness.

Throw them out, cut them off, and do everything you can to make sure your child starves and suffers, said the books. (I read them all.) Hunger and homelessness were the goal, they advised, but any misery you could cause was helpful. Turn other relatives against them, don't let them take their belongings when they go, cancel phone contracts and insurance plans.

When your child asks for help because they can't support themselves, you can force them to leave their beloved and drop their friends in exchange for survival, said the books. They will either eventually see that you and God are right and loving, and repent of their sin, or you will catch them lying to you and sneaking around, which is proof that homosexuality and other sins go hand in hand.

One book acknowledged that cutting them off would endanger teenagers and young adults and leave them vulnerable to rape, murder, and human trafficking (though it called being trafficked "prostitution"). But Christian parents acting in the name of God's love would not be responsible for the harm their kids suffered, it said: the children were bringing whatever happened to them on themselves as a natural consequence of living a sinful lifestyle.

In fact, said the book, being attacked or abused could be good for your children: if they suffer enough they may realize it’s their gayness that has caused all their problems and repent of their disgusting unacceptable love and desire.

In the United States, LGBT children represent 40% of homeless youth under 18. "Family conflict" is the number-one cause of LGBT youth homelessness.

I was 22 when the pastor of my boyfriend’s church received news that one of his congregants was engaged in a same-sex affair. Extramarital affairs were very common in his church—three of the deacons were cheating on their wives with other (also married) congregants, and my bf’s parents had been swingers —but this was the first and only time the pastor ever called a church member to the altar, outed him by described his sin to the congregation (c. 350), and demanded the man apologize to everyone and ask their forgiveness. The pastor told him that if he did not apologize he and his wife and children were not welcome to continue attending.

I was 23 when I heard that same pastor’s sermon on avoiding sexual temptation. Give up affection if it causes you to sin, he said. Scoop out your own eyes, cut off your own hand. He instructed men only to hug other men side-along, one arm around their shoulders, lest a real embrace cause them to feel sexual desire for another man. (No mention was made about how women should hug, or that women might ever feel sexual desire at all.)

I remember listening to this pastor's sermon and thinking, I know something about this man that he does not know about himself.

I was 24 when I went with my boyfriend to Pulpit Rock Church, seeking answers from the sermon they advertised on their signboard about sex and sexuality and gender. My boyfriend loved wearing women's clothes. Transgender and cross-dressing were just starting to replace transsexual and transvestite as the accepted terms for the things he might be. Nonbinary and genderqueer were not words we had. He wasn’t sure yet which thing he was; the thing he was was still, for us, unspeakable.

"Men are created to be men and women are created to be women," preached the pastor at Pulpit Rock. "Men and women are different in a way that can't be explained, and they fit together in a relationship in a divine way. A man and a man or a woman and a woman may love each other, but they'll never have the spiritual connection of a godly relationship that a man and a woman can have. We don't have to understand it, but we shouldn't question it, because that’s the way God made it."

Then he talked about how he and his wife could both make French toast (or maybe it was pancakes), but the way his wife made French toast was female somehow--ineffably--because she was a woman, even though the French toast was the same. My bf and I left in the middle of the sermon.

I was 25 when Ted Haggard, best friend of Focus on the Family founder James Dobson (of “Spongebob is teaching our kids it's ok to be gay” controversy) and pal of George W. Bush (the POTUS who pursued, in his own words, "a Crusade" in Iraq with the U.S. military to fight the influence of demons "Gog and Magog[…] at work in the Middle East"), was publicly outed. Male escort and Mike Jones—whom Haggard hired to sell him meth and give him happy-ending massages—recognized ‘Pastor Ted’ as the leader of Colorado Springs evangelical megachurch New Life Church, a nationally famous preacher who denounced the evils of homosexuality from his pulpit, and Jones, a big damn hero, tipped off the press.

I had heard Pastor Ted preach twice. New Life Church was a lot like Heaven in Show Omens in that it had a lot of open space and bright fluorescent lighting and smiling well-groomed people in it, as well as several giant digital screens floating in the air to either side of its dais on which the face of the straight-passing white man bringing his people the word of God was projected as he spoke. This latter feature also resulted in a slight resemblance to a Hitler rally, but there was more medium-stained oak in play than either Hitler or Heaven would find tasteful.

I was 26 when I acted as an informal lettings agent for one of my landlord's other apartments and the young Christian woman living downstairs asked me refuse shelter to any gay or lesbian people because she didn't want to have to live in the same building with them.

When I asked her how I was supposed to know whether someone was gay, she said, “Well you can just tell, can’t you?”

I was 30 when I came out to my Christian parents. Having read the Christian parenting books, I was hugely relieved when they didn't throw me out of their house, where I was living after college (and a few major depressive episodes and two global recessions). I was relieved that they wanted to continue to have a relationship with me at all, in fact.

"I still think it's a sin, though," my mother gently reminded me. My father has refused ever to discuss it at all.

I was 31 when I moved to the UK. I've spent 11 years trying and failing to scrape a living in the Thatcher-hollowed market towns around Manchester, under the fucking Tories, through fucking Brexit, through fucking May and fucking Boris and that weird little cabbage Liz Truss, in order to stay out of Colorado Springs. I can't get medical care on the NHS and I can't work or leave my apartment bc I can't get medical care and I can't heat my apartment in winter on Universal Credit and I’ve been threatened and assaulted by doctors and raped by a nurse and I’ve tried suicide a few times, and I'm in some smallish danger of dying here in Britain's left armpit, but I am not in Colorado fucking Springs today, am I. So that's something at least.

I was 41 and living in the UK for a decade when a homophobe with Christian parents shot up the only gay venue in Colorado Springs, Club Q, murdering 5 people and shooting 19 more. I'd been to Club Q a few times, on dead nights, when I lived in the city. The shooting was 24 years after homophobes tied Matthew Shepard to a fence and left him dying as a warning to the rest of us.

I never told my best friend I was in love with her.

Instead I had anxiety dreams in which my subconscious warned me I wasn't safe. In one dream, Not Yet appeared tattooed on the back of my hand as I looked at a female classmate who was dating another girl. I had to wear gloves to hide the rainbow that had appeared, indelible, on my ring finger.

My first kiss was with a (Christian) boy.

I knew what I felt for my best friend was effervescent and golden and breath-stealing. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, knew I wanted to live with her in a little house in the Pacific Northwest in the mist and the trees and make her coffee with a Turkish press anytime she wanted it and cuddle her on the closed porch and gripe about the wool in her sweater prickling my arms when I hugged her. I knew her eyelashes made her eyes look like they had stars in them and that she had the lushest curves and most perfect skin I had ever seen, and that when she smiled or laughed the shape of her mouth made something in me ache like tuning forks must ache when they're struck and made to sing.

I never told my best friend I was in love with her because I didn't know those were the words for what I was feeling.

Not until years later, after she had left my life. I had been told (frequently) by a Higher Authority that queer love was disgusting and ruinous and sinful and ugly and twisted and inferior, not this perfect fragile thing as soft and trembling-alive as a bird in my hands. Why would I think this was queer love?

I didn't catch the worst of it. I wasn't chained to a bed or forced to drink water from a dog dish, like the foster parents of the gay kid in class did to him. (The school asked him to give a talk to our class so they'd bully him less, so he told us about his life as the teachers looked on. He was 12.) I wasn't sent to conversion therapy like one classmate. I didn't spend most of my childhood in Bible School like other devout Christians' children; my family read the Bible a lot, and prayed together, but my parents weren't regular churchgoers. I was so, so lucky.

It destroyed me anyway.

The thesis of my essay runs thus, fellow ineffables: A happy ending for Crowley and Aziraphale is necessary.

It is necessary not just because Bury Your Gays is an overdone trope and an act of homophobia in the hands of straight writers; not just because Good Omens has been crafted with such loving care in both book and show incarnations to be optimistic, even sunny, against a backdrop of Orwellian, cosmic, and Kafka-esque horror; not just because casting miracles of the magnitude of David Tennant as Crowley and Michael Sheen as Aziraphale happen once a generation and it would be a shame and a waste not to write more magic for them to chew on; it is necessary because, in most places here in Shitworld, there are real people having the experience Crowley and Aziraphale are having, and not all of us are able to make happy endings for ourselves.

We don't have ethereal/occult powers or authorial control, so we need stories to show us how to love and when to fight and why to fucking bother. And the harder those things are to see in this world, the more we need those stories. And the more we need people with influence and audience and privilege telling them, not just all us little Tumblr rats and AO3 and Pillowfort perverts.

Crowley and Aziraphale exist in a fascist universe run by the ultimate Authoritarian—not Big Brother, but Big Father. There is nowhere for them to go, not even their own minds, where it is safe for them to love each other openly. I am completely prepared to believe someone in those circumstances could go 6,000 years without realizing the love they feel for their best friend is the kissing kind of love. I know someone can go a whole lifetime without saying it.

The hosts of Heaven and Hell will take away even the words for love when they can. We need people who don't just wield words but the power of the word spreading the message "There is a way to make this work. There is a way to exist. You can make a new world."

Mr Gaiman, I know from reading some of your other work that a big part of your whole Deal as a writer is an ongoing enthusiasm for the immense, even mystical, power stories have to shape individual and shared realities—sometimes to doom people and lock them into a destiny, but as often to let them escape their fate by imagining and conceiving a new way of living, or of living with each other, where none was possible before.

Hate and hope are the result of the stories we tell each other--I know you know this because I know you know that in saying it I am referencing a story you wrote. Like the hate, that hope only exists if an author says it does. And real people’s hearts, real people’s lives, are made and broken by listening to the wrong stories or hearing the right ones.

Crowley and Aziraphale are your characters, and Good Omens is your story to tell. You have written a setup in which, if you want these characters to be able to love each other, you (they) will have to create a world where that is possible. Please write us a romance. Please put enough sweet in with the bitter that we can survive it.

We have such faith in you because you have shown your readers and your audiences that you deserve that faith. Please choose your phrases wisely. ❤️

#good omens #good omens 2 #human rights #Colorado Springs #lgbtq #writing #religion #christianity #aziracrow #aziraphale x crowley #neil gaiman #stories #ineffable husbands #good omens s2 #trauma #mental illness #tmi #say your right words the goblins said

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